Kim's - Valuable Tips, Ideas, and Insights to greater Confidence and Success

Click here to view Kimberley Roberts' bioetiquette, manners, confidence, and success go hand-in-hand Welcome to my ClassyTip for this week which focuses on:

- Appearance
- Behavior
- Communication

Poise and Balance - Tip #33

The scientific definition of poised is ‘being in the state of equilibrium’; it is being ‘in balance’. And it is the fifth most frequently identified characteristic of a classy person - being poised. So how do we achieve this poise, balance, or equilibrium?

Poise is reflected in both the way we look, as well as the way we act. Being poised means how we hold our head when we are standing, sitting, or moving. It also reflects how we talk and communicate. And it is reflected in our behavior.

How a poised person looks --
First of all, poised does not mean posed. If someone is posed, he/she is stiff and not moving. A posed posture is strained because it is ‘fixed or arranged’, and a person talking from this position will show that strain in his/her body and voice. So we don’t want to pose to become poised!

Being poised means our body looks balanced, in a position to function as it stands or moves. A slumped posture, or hanging one’s head with our eyes looking at the floor, doesn’t give the illusion that the body is in a position to move effectively, or balanced. When we hang our head, our body looks ‘top heavy’ and out of balance.

It is also important to realize that clothing always looks better on a poised body with good posture, because it hangs nicely from the shoulders. Suits even help us out in this area because they are made with shoulder pads to better balance the look of our body.

How a poised person speaks --
When we are poised and maintain balance in our tone of voice, we give others the message that we are prepared and in control of our thoughts and actions. Other people can rely on what we are saying, which instills a sense of confidence.

Being prepared gives us composure, which is especially useful in stressful situations. This preparation will reflect in our voice, and even if we are under stress or strain, it will not be apparent to those around us.

When we are poised and speaking to another person, we don’t go to extremes. Even if we are praising or criticizing, we stay balanced and in control with our tone of voice and the words we use. Always be careful of words like always, never, everyone, best, and worst. Also refrain from using obscenities, cussing, belittling, or abusive language.

How a poised person acts –-
When we are poised, we are well adjusted and not emotionally agitated, so we have the ability to make good rational decisions. Our behavior is composed and calm; we are decisive and self-reliant. There is a sense of security about who we are and what we are doing, which reassures others around us. It is the foundation for becoming a great leader.

Poise can be described as being dignified or serene. If a poised person walks into a room, eyes automatically go to that person. ‘A quiet poise’ may characterize a powerful person who has the innate ability to connect with other people, while instilling their confidence in his/her vision, without force or threat.

Being a poised person is being a balanced person, so we are seen and heard ‘in equilibrium’.

The classy person maintains a balance in all areas of his/her life. There is a sense of stability and confidence, as he/she does not need to go to extremes -- whether in wardrobe choices, in tone of voice, or in decision making.

I'm Looking forward to sending you another of my ClassyTips next week. Until then, have a great week, and don't forget to visit my Forum where you can ask your questions on 'Becoming the Best You Can Be'.

Kiberley Roberts ClassyTips

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